While not at physics...

Doctor! Doctor! I have tuberculosis!
What? How do you know?
Well I was ironing my skirts when I got it.
Who told you that that causes tb?
My firend in Canada.
Canada?
Yes, the villiage on a mountain, remeber?
Oh! Yes yes!! You should not go there....
Why doctor?
Because there is this bad girl and you will talk to her.
Oh, alright doctor.
And doctor my head hurts.
Why?
I hit it on a door.
Come here.
...
OW! Why did you hit my head?
Well thats how you make it better.
But it doesn't-
Are you the doctor or am I?
Alright, alright.
I am giving you anitbiotics, it will have some interesting bowel effects...
Oh but doctor I have to go and sit in the sun.
Its alright, just be around a toilet when you eat shaworma, and get one for a princess...
Very well doctor I shall. Can I go and clean the world?
No no you cannot, becuase that is exercise and you will lose weight and then you will not be able to have children.
Oh no! How will I survive without little humans ricocheting off the walls and into me like I'm not there?
You see? You cannot go, besides have you seen the state of your room?
Fine doctor.
Oh and do not eat watermelon and milk in the same hour.
Why?
It will give you white spots.
And black ones?
No, those are bruises.
Why are the black?
Because of SEVERE internal bleeding! It is life threatening!
Oh NO! Should I get it checked?
Nah, It'll go away itself.
Ok doctor I have to go to get my hair cut now.
But its a Saturday.
I know, so what?
You cannot cut your hair on a Saturday, what will people think?
Hunh?
The Jews fast on Saturday. You souldn't cut your hair.
Oh, really? Alright then. I still have to leave though, thank you doctor.
You're welcome. Remeber your medicine.
I will

********

Wierdness Galore!
This is the product of my idle mind.
You don't have to understand it.